HAPPY NEW YEEAR!

i know it's a little bit overdue, but i'm still in the festive mood of ringing in the new year (or maybe because i have finally gotten over my hangover). i still have vague recollections of dec.31; however, skimming through the photos via facebook has jogged flashbacks haha. i woke up in the morning wearing the clothes from the previous night, along w/ my shoes and jacket....covered in what seems to be a fusion between 2 rows of ferrero rocher & 10+ jager bombs. i quickly checked my pockets for the essentials to see if they were intact: wallet? check. phone? fuck. batteries? what the fuck? (SIDENOTE: sorry tim, i can only assume these are yours - i owe you 4 double A's)

i don't even really mean to drink as much as i did (which probably wasn't as much as i think, pusssy) & i rarely do drink, but when i do? i quote jamie foxx, "i make it do what it do baby". (which again, probably isn't that much)

i think i've come a while's way since my first new years drinking experience: grade 8, i shared a smirnoff ice. i was trippin balls



&& this was my face for the most portion of the night - me x belinda

livin' in HD

the only resoultion i got is a HD 1080i 47'' flatscreen sittin in my living room. haha

only a couple days till '08 shits all over '07. to be honest, 2007 flew by like a motherfucker! but prettty eventful. "please take us through it, chronologically & point form", diary. LET'S GOO!

• tatted up number 6
• pulled a kanye on college
• philippines
• left my dead end up after three years
• started another dead end job
• break up
• mexico
• make up
• break up
• make up hahah
• tatted up number 7
• got cut a fat cheque w/ stu
• got outtta debt!!!!

you ready '08? i'm money hungry! i'm ready to make that tuition money :) let's see those unecessary commas before the decimal point!

mURRy christmas!

it's just a little past 4:30pm on christmas eve, and i just finished my christmas shopping - HOLLA! man west ed is a fucking zoo, and i've been to that mall maybe over 10 times this month BUT for some reason i wait till the last day to actually get my shit done.

it hasn't really hit me till now with having the whole "christmas spirit". why? because the mr. bean christmas special is on :)

well this is short, just wanted to wish everyone a merry christmas!

g-g-g-gangsta lean!

number 7? holy cow, if tattoos were crack i'd be tyrone biggums!


as i'm typing this i have my right leg up in the air to relieve the pressure off my foot ( i kinda look like a cheezy porno mag spread). now i'm walkin w/ a limp, with blood clots staining my socks, GANGSTA! ANYWAYS, yesterday i went w/ my sister to get a "bonding" tattoo. buut we ditched the idea of getting similiar tattoos for the time being - so we just got "regular" tattoos? haha.

FIRST off i wanna say, my sister is a TANK! she sat through her shit like a champ. while i was watchin i was thinkin to myself, "this is gonna be a breeeeeze" ..... man am i a pussy

seriously that tattoo was probably the worse painful experience i've had out of all 7. i went hard on my chest for a good 8 hours and that couldn't compare to the one hour on my foot haha. i couldn't find my "zen zone", i was trippin out makin faces like a dipped my shlong in a cup of icy hot.. it was a mess.

but what was REAL trip was that while we were @ the shop, our artist (kev) was asking if we were related to a guy named rodney. i was like, "uhh not to sure - what's his last name?" "rodney fabiosa" (it was his previous client he did up a couple weeks back)....what the fuck? there's more than 4 fabiosa's in edmonton? LET ALONE CANADA? kev said he was around my age n shit, so that's hella random. buuut rodney, if somehow you read this - you better stay clear from urge. kev said something bout missing 2 appointments? time is money, and kev said he'd curb stomp your ass if he saw you again :) what a way to put our last name to shame and i don't even know you.

love,
i-have-a-mangina-because-i-skipped-out-on-work-cause-of-my-tattoo-lance

i am..

... a liar, good thing i'm not a scout. so i've been REALLY putting off bloggin for a while.

lately i've been having emo moments. not w/ my heart, nor my penis-heart, rather w/ my brain-heart (?). i'm going through the post-drop-out-of-school-(for funding issues, not cause i don't like school)-and-hating-work-because-i-really-wanna-go-back-to-school-because-i-have-money-now syndrome.

BUT i want to be investing my money+time into something that will a) interest me and b) give me money like a teenager gets acne. i've had alot of time on my hands lately so i usually jump into my wet-suit and surf the web for possible careers. && regardless to the endless list i've made, i'm still stuck w/ "is it interest over money? or the other way around"....cause heaven forbids i'd actually come across something that makes both ends meet.

i really want to say i'll post mexico blogs and/or photos - but i probably won't. that's a lie, i will. that's a lie too - but i will eventually...really.

actions speak louder than blogs

for those devoted readers, i'm still here (hey mom). give me a couple days, scouts honour :)

RANDOMVIDEO;

the real ebony & ivory haha

quickie

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; t pain - i'm sprung

OLA PUTAS! just touched down a couple hours ago, and i'm already fucking w/ my computer. that's called devoution, or nerdiness @ it's finest.

throughout the whole trip i had "i'm sprung" stuck in my head. actually i had it in my head inbetween marv's marathon of chris brown SLASH trey songz. so this song has been on repeat since i got home to get it out of my system haha. man t-pain is the shit :) well except for his looks.

BRB for mexico blogs

i've been workin all day, now i'm gone so cya

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; sleepy brown ft. big boi & pharrell - margaritas

i'm sitting on my floor w/ an abundant of shit all around me, trying to figure out what is critical to pack? stunnas, check. underwear, check. comic books, check. AND i'm set :)

i noticed yesterday that i'm lacking shorts for this trip. so i went on a quest today w/ my sis to find me a couple pairs of shorts. A REASONABLE theory would be that all the shorts would be on sale, with wanting to get rid of them for their winter stock. i was wrong :(

so i'm stuck w/ the dilemma of going back to what i did in high school. scrunching the legs of my pants up, and hold that shit up w/ rubberbands (gheettoo).

so today @ work, before i left i noticed all my co-workers writing on this big piece of paper. i was like AAAWWW, it's goin to be a "have a safe trip" kinda card. yet again, i was wrong :(


click on it for the full size. heads up, my nickname @ work is "porno lance"

take a mEMO

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; the sound of my dad playing filipino christmas music

what's good? ME! what's hood? the extra piece of cloth that covers my head on sweaters.
lately i felt that i really only "need"ed to blog when some sort of event has just taken place, or in 7 day intervals. buut, you know, this is my shit - i created it, i can say whatever the fuck i want :)

i leave in under a week to mexico, weee! that'll be hella gnarly. i don't know really what to pack? or even to expect from mexico. all i got so far is a fresh pack of hanes boxer briefs & a healthy liver waiting to be raped by tequila.

hmm weak, i'm listenin to my playlist on shuffle & jt came on. usually he makes me wanna dance my heart out n shit ahha, but man his sad songs are SAD. like i'm not emo, but foooor real it's like he's singing about me, not to me cause that be h-omo (but hey it's jt, i wouldn't say no if he did want to sing to me. maybe he's lady-lingering powers would transfer onto me).

so over the past year i went through a phase where i thought i was a rapper. my rhymes were really weak - from "bitches" to money (which i was lacking both). but then a couple months ago, i started getting into poetry (but then i went from a "poser" to a "emo"). so i don't know what i'm really shooting for. i have no intentions on being the next lupe, but i think it's kinda fun playin w/ words & shit. sooo i decided to unlock the chasity belt to my "words", and here and there i'll post some of it? cool? cool :)

"dude i'm fucking cute"

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; bow wow ft. omarion - girlfriend

(lance laying on his bed on his stomach w/ his legs wiggling in the air) DEAR DIARY.... hahah

so last night i lost my virginity, my virginity to high-pitched repetitive sounds while dancing my heart till 5 in the mornin. so marv/floyd/chris/stu managed to break down my preconceived feelings towards raves last night - cause braa that shit was hella crazy. but what was fucked up was that we waited in line to get in for fucking TWO HOURS! && i remember i had to pee hella bad w/ stu, so we just pissed around the stairs area in the west ed parkin lot, and when i turn around there's two guys, dressed up in what seemed to be the left over costume shit that ends up on the floor at zellers, standing behind me staring at me smokin:

"that was a really long pee man"
"yeah braa, did u guys need to piss too? it's all yours"
"no we're good"
long pause
"so why are u guys standing behind me?"
long pause
"that's a nice costume"
& that's when i PEACED THE FUCK OUTTA THERE hahaha

but yea man, i felt like i was reading a comic book when i was there - cause a saw a shitload of X-men. eh eh? ECS-men? ECSTASY? thank you thank you, i'm here all week :)

overall great night, who doesn't wanna love a teddy bear? haha

RANDOMVIDEO;

predrinkin before scream; 1:10, "have u guys ever gone 3 days w/out pooing?" - stuart

gr.7 lance had an icebox

been a minute since i've last blogged. couple a days ago i was @ the gym w/ teets and we were talkin bout shit back from junior high when all the filipinos went through the phase of thinkin they were korean (don't front homie, i know you were one of them haha). ANYWAYS, do u remember that korean music video called kiss? or some shit like that. did i have no heart when i was younger, or was i some sort of a fat kid w/ glasses slash cyborg? cause shiiit, i just watched that vid today and i ain't sayin i'm a pussy or nothing - but there must be something wrong w/ the heating in my crib cause my eyes were all sweaty.

a-dooo-kit

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; crank dat ryuuuuuuuu!

"lance, whats your plans for friday?"
"youtubing"

siiigh, it's friday night & i'm @ home. seriously, my parents get more hyphy than i do :( this is hella dumb that i gotta work tomorrow, buuut i do live by c.r.e.a.m so it's all good.

so i spent the most portion of my night looking up highlights of floyd mayweather jr's career on youtube, then i came across his vids from dancing w/ the stars. why oh why? that shit is for D listed celebrities, mayweathers is deee shiiiit! haha. anyways, somehow searching through that shits i came across a home video of some punks crankin dat, "now watch me DOOOOOO"

but what the fuck is this? i know i heard crank dat spiderman/aquaman/batman......but fucking forest gump? i was hesitant at first, but over the past hour i've done more cardio than i have my whole life. i've cranked dat ryu to crankin dat megaman. braa, $10 bucks - youtube anything w/ "crank dat _____", you'll find it.. ex. "crank dat millwoods suburban thug"

fuck braa, i think i got into this too much - somebody WIPE ME DOWN! hahaaha

nu uh, you can't tell me nothing

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; the sound of my clippers to my head

so i guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks - i'm bald, fuck.

1 month hiatus

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; jay z ft. beyonce - bonnie & clyde

cough cough, oh my head - i feeel so sick.....of work :) so its a lil before 11am and hey, i'm @ home and not at work. i thought i jus needed a day to chill & recollect myself from the past couple weeks. alright dim the lights, we're gonna get emo:

i ain't really gonna pour out my soul n shit, cause we'll i'm not that kinda PERSON that messages comments to other people which really should be for their eyes only, but does it for the fuck of it for reasons i have no idea haha. but i feel this quote from this song applies to us,

Only time we don't speak is during Sex and the City.

She gets Carrie fever, but soon as the show is over

She's right back to being my soldier

.

.

.

i guess she was just watching the boxset, haha.

lechon hair

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; method man ft. lauryn hill - things they say

man oh man another saturday :) i'm so glad i didn't have to work today, cause i was running out of excuses to skip out on saturdays haha. i woke up this morning 'round 7 to a facebook mobile - ya diiig haha. so i thought why not make use of my weekend and popped in one of my dvd's that i copped yesterday. first off (lance stands up to start a slow dramatic clap that soon turns into a thunderous applause) "the outsiders" is the shit, it's kinda like a preteen version of "four brothers". the cast itself was fuckin gnarly, you had: the coach from mighty ducks, the white cop that sexually harrassed and saved her black ass in crash, oprah couch-stomper, the dirty dirty dancer, and the mother fucking karate kid! (plus two other guys that i can't think of a "funny"). these dudes were badass w/ the whole jean jackets and hair that looks like they scooped the grease from my left over dong pong lechon.

as i was in the middle of the movie, i hear my doorbell go off. my blinds are wide open, i'm sittin in the field of vision of anyone that walks by my house or is @ the doorstep...in my underwear. i don't know why i stood up, looked right at the mormons - they look straight back at me and sat back down. i was like, "this is MY house (not really), i don't gotta answer shit". so maybe 2 minutes go by, and then i hear knockin on the window AND THESE DUDES ARE LOOKING AT ME (the kinda look where their nose is molesting the glass w/ their hands on both side of their faces to "get a closer look") SITTING ON MY COUCH! so i did what any other tough millwoods thug would do. i paused my movie and went to my room for like 10 minutes waiting for them to leave, duh.



so i copped that movie w/ the beverly hills cop trilogy ( 2 for $30 holla!) and knocked up. straight up you can quote this shit, i liked knocked up more than superbad. don't get me wrong, superbad was hella funny but i wanted to "SUPERSOAK THAT HOOOE!" katherine heigl.

r-e-a-d--a--b-o-OKAAAY

SONGOFTHMOMENT; jay z ft. foxy brown & babyface - sunshine (remix)

so i'm taking a break from reading and decided to hit the computer. shit, it feels like i'm in school all over again. difference, i'm reading on my own will. i had a deja vu while i was reading though, you know when you're studyin into those wee hours of the night and you don't know until you look in the mirror, that your eyes are in the same squint as when your drivin w/ the sun in your eyes. speaking of school, i think i need to head back sooner or later, feels like i'm back in elementary, where i seperate all my ideas into a paragraph bonded by the glue of commas.

so to compensate for the lose of time that i'm not in school, i feel i should back track and re-read all those novels that i neglected and reduced myself to sparknotes.com. ie. the alchemist, life of pi etc.


thursday = payday >> payday = deposit for australia >> australia + mexico = i must be from harlem, cause i'm a globetrotter >> (australia + mexico) + current debt = working more overtime >> fuck

happy thr33 months

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; dj khaled ft. rick ross & flo rida - birthday
(8)i don't want no cake on my berday, i want my cake erday erday BiiiTCH(8)

i'm layin in bed & i can honestly say i've seen that music video for highschool music 2 where their gettin hella hyphy that it's summer n shit, maybe just a lil shy over 15582 times just in this morning. but it's not the same, i thought that vanessa hudgens was oh so fine until the dreaded night i received the link to her "saucy" photos. she looked like any other broke & bougie TC hoodrat - damn.

haha so yesterday was kinda funny. me stu and marv went to the travel agency to pay off the rest of our fees & shit, then i get a txt from P that she and her ma was stranded - so she gets this idea thinkin that me and marv can boost a car, bitch please. but if that gets girls - call me a fuckin grease monkey, HOLLA!

so congrats baby, we pushed through it - we fly together in any weather. happy three months hair :) oh yea, happy birthday to me.

...... so if u guys were beside me you'd know that this post is takin me well over an hour to write, i just came back from takin a beer shit & i noticed that i have a scar from yesterday on my neck, maybe it could pass for a hickie? badass? no? ok :( ANYWAYS i just walked into the kitchen to be overwhelmed w/ snuggles from my hippie parents as my mom was cookin pancit she said, and i quote, " i'm makin this for you, long noodles - long life (mom does a lil shuffle dance/laugh)"

everything seems so CLEAR...on EVERLCEAR

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; chris singing britney spears - gimmi more

so it's a little past 2am, and im' sitting here drunk off of everclear watchin hannah montana. me and team kdub just came back from ....i THINK ivory club, but i know for sure we were @ dennys.

my eyes are tighter than my ass cheeks when it comes to money, i feel like i'm part of a chinese pop group. sooo me and team kdub (f-man, marky mark, mr. continnentntnal) and kaycee&angelie, kareoked our heart out for the mos tportion of the night. hella fun? hella yes :) . then yea we're drunk, i'm drunk . i'm full off of lumberjackc from dennys :)

well i'm off to bed nine, goodnight dairy.

love,
lumberjackLANCE]]

sorry if my shit is notyped good :) OH YEA, team kdub is now TEAM MEXICO, november7th BITCH

kiss the cook

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; the dream ft. fabolous - shawty is a 10

whaat it is, what it iiiis! can u smell that too diary? sniiff sniff, oh - it's the mother fucking weekeend :) finally i can rest my fragile-butterfly body haha.

i can't really say much has happen w/in the last week. i'm just gettin my baker on, tryin to make that croissant & stack that shit like croutons. and hopefully turn that bread into taco shells, because f-man has been stirring up some shit && if all goes well, in november i'll be hearing, "AY PAPI!" haha.

let this post be the appetizer to your sexually charged eyes my diary, there will be more - oh there will be more.

love,
mr. 7am-330pm

nintendo "d.s" aka DA SHIIIIT :)

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; trey songz - can't help but wait

whaaaat it iiis! sup love, i'm back from the depths of the emo tunnel - slowly my music transitions are coming back to the norm. delilah is cranking that soulja boy prior to the thrills getting hyphy, haha.

so yesterday was pretty interesting - i got in touch w/ my inner gaming-asian. i kicked/pushed my way to teets crib to game out for a couple hours w/ mr. continental on the ps3 and ds - shits hella fun, but straight up playin that shit hurts my eyes like mad nuts. maybe it was caused by the factors of teets environment. don't get me wrong, i'm all about conserving energy, but brraa - i had to use the illuminating light from the ds to guide my piss into the toliet (haha jjoooke).

later on that night me, wahlberg, & fman hit up the ivory club just for the fuck of it. & u know what, that place is hella fun. i felt like tarzan in the jungle, i was 1 out of the 2 coloured ppl up in that bitch and i surrounded by cougars - yeeee diig haha. but nah honestly the place is all good to have a fun time.

RANDOMPHOTO;

back when i was 16 gettin' my first tattoo, bastos! whatta gangsta haha :)

443 days

SONGOFTHEMOMENT; john legend - ordinary people

i know usually when i try to make you listen to my choice of songs - you dont' see farther than the beat, but just listen to the lyrics.

youtube'd

just a hella good video that i've been playin over&over lately :) but why oh why, for filipinos - if u can sing ur either hella ugly and/or gay :(